The Good Mom?

the most important thing she’d learned over the years was that there was no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one”- Jill Churchill

This week we lost a great mom in our community, a mom to her own kids and at school a “mom” to dozens.  Her loss and the way people remember her really made a lot of us reflect on our own mortality and also how we are doing in the “what really matters” department.  Perhaps a lot of our tears came from those reflections- good or bad.

So, this blog is called roadtoironmom– yes, “mom” being a key word.  Day to day it feels like I can manage it all, training, mommying, wife-ing, planning for 5, etc.  But training and racing (even just a little) requires a certain self centeredness to create the time and space and detachment from household activities.  I know many out there wonder what my kids might be missing for me to do what I do. I wonder too sometimes.  Like I admittedly avoid certain sports that may require too many practices or games on days that are important for training or events.  Is this right or wrong? I don’t know, but I do question myself at times.  I do think it helps them to not only rely on me for everything, but their dad, nana, and other support crew.  They surely do get along better with almost anyone than most kids their age.   But I sometimes feel like I should be a mom who 100% focused on their needs and activities.  What if say I was in a bike accident and they were left to say, well she sure was good at training alot.  Ok I know it’s not that bad, but I want to be aware for sure of a balance of priorities.  I want to raise kids who feel loved, empowered to take care of themselves when they are grown, and keep a relationship going with my best friend, my husband.  I guess for me fulfilling personal goals will help them see how to accomplish for themselves too?  That people don’t just do stuff for you forever?!  But there is that line I struggle with, as they grow and I explore more freedom as a mom of “older” kids, that they truly get my attention, and really know how much I adore them.

So this road to ironmom is definitely about more than a training plan and an event.  It is daily a life lesson to never stop questioning and evaluating how you are doing, why, what can be better or needs adjusted.  Also, to take no moment for granted, not by stopping responsibilities of daily life (I imagine teens saying hey, i’m just livin life  now! why get a job or have boundaries?lol) , but by appreciating all those little moments in work, play, family, the mundane, the exciting achievements.

So to the mom’s and mom figures out there– you are good mom’s – we may all be different mom’s but I know we  have the best intentions.

My crew Tahoe- 2011

1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Kristi Olson-Edwards
    Aug 16, 2011 @ 09:04:43

    well said my friend.
    Kristi

    Like

    Reply

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